1.It seems like an awful lot of trouble to go through for intercourse. Don’t you have access to women that will do it for money?看來要經歷一段性關系還真是麻煩得要命。你就不能花錢找個妓女嗎？

　　2.You accidently stare at a helium-argon laser, lose one turn and a retina.你一不小心直視氦氬激光，暫停一輪并失去一只眼睛的視網膜。

　　3.Stop it! Both of you! All this fighting. I might as well be back with my parents. "Damn it, George, I told you if you didn’t stop drinking I’d leave you!" "W’all I guess that makes you a liar cause I’m drunk as hell and you’re still here." "Stop yelling, you’re making Sheldon cry!" "I’ll tell you what’s making Sheldon cry, that I let you name him Sheldon."別吵了，你們兩個！聽你們吵個不停簡直就跟我爸媽一樣“該死的喬治，我說過你要是再不戒酒我就離開你！”“這只能說明你是個騙子，我已經醉成這樣，你還沒走。”“別嚷了，謝爾頓快被你弄哭了！”“告訴你謝爾頓為什么哭吧，因為我讓你給他起了這個破名。”

　　4.I’ve heard that before. Then the next thing you know, I’m hiding in my bedroom blaring a Richard Feynman lecture while my Mom is shouting that Jesus would forgive her if she put ground glass in my Dad’s meatloaf. And my Dad’s on the roof skeet shooting her Franklin Mint collectible plates.這話我聽多了。但然后呢？接下來我躲在自己的臥室大聲讀著費曼（著名物理學家）的講義，而我媽則在吼叫著說她即使在我爸的烘肉卷里放上玻璃渣，上帝也會原諒她的。還有我爸，站在屋頂上，用我媽的富蘭克林珍藏版碗碟玩雙向飛碟射擊。

　　5.You keep in mind that my sharply worded comments on Yelp.com recently took down a muffin store.記住我在Yelp.com那些關于一家本地松餅店言辭尖銳的評論。

　　6.Mister Spock did not pilot the Enterprise. He was a Science officer. And I guarantee you if he ever saw the Enterprise’s check engine light blinking, he would pull the ship over immediately.史波克不是企業號的駕駛員。他是科學家。還有我保證只要他看到企業號的檢查引擎指示燈閃那么一下，他會下令靠邊停。

　　7.According to the inexplicably irritable nurse behind the desk, you’ll be seen after the man who claims to be having a heart attack, but appears to be well enough to play Doodle Jump on his iPhone.那位莫名暴躁的接待護士說，你排在那個聲稱自己有心臟病的男人后面，但在我看來，他健康的很，還能在他的iphone上玩涂鴉跳躍呢。

　　8.Now remember, you were given powerful pain medications and a muscle relaxer. So, uh, don’t operate heavy machinery. And try not to choke on your own drool.記住，你剛吃了強力止痛藥還有肌肉松弛劑，所以千萬別去操作重型機械。小心別讓自己口水噎到窒息。

　　9.Why are you such a stupidhead? That is also rhetorical. Sorry you had to hear that.為什么你是個笨蛋？這也是個比喻。真抱歉你們不得不聽到這些。

　　10.Biologically speaking, Howard is perfectly justified in seeking out the optimum mate for the propagation of his genetic line, and if that propagation is in the interest of humanity is, of course, an entirely different question.從生物學角度上說，霍華德想找最佳伴侶繁衍后代完全合情合理，但這種繁殖如果站在人類進化的角度來看又是完全不同的問題。