Love Is Not Like Merchandise

　　A reader in Florida apparently2 bruised3 by some personal experience, writes in to complain, “If I steal a nickel’s4 worth of merchandise, I am a thief and punished; but if I steal the love of another’s wife, I am free.”

　　This is a prevalent5 misconception in many people’s minds — that love, like merchandise, can be “stolen”. Numerous states, in fact, have enacted6 laws allowing damages for “alienation of affections7”.

　　But love is not a commodity; the real thing cannot be bought, sold, traded or stolen. It is an act of the will, a turning of the emotions, a change in the climate of the personality．

　　When a husband or wife is “stolen” by another person, that husband or wife was already ripe for the stealing, and was already predisposed8 toward a new partner. The “lovebandit9” was only taking what was waiting to be taken, what wanted to be taken.

　　We tend to treat persons like goods. We even speak of children “belonging” to their parents. But nobody “belongs” to anyone else. Each person belongs to himself. Children are entrusted10 to their parents, and if their parents do not treat them properly, the state has a right to remove them from their parents’ trusteeship11.

　　Most of us, when young, had the experience of a sweetheart being taken from us by somebody more attractive and more appealing12. At the time, we may have resented this intruder—but as we grew older, we recognized that the sweetheart had never been ours to begin with13. It was not the intruder that “caused” the break, but the lack of a real relationship．

　　On the surface, many marriages seem to break up because of a “third party.” This is, however, a psychological14 illusion15. The other woman or the other man merely serves as a pretext16 for dissolving a marriage that had already lost its essential integrity17.

愛情不是商品

　　一位佛羅里達州讀者顯然是在個人經歷上受過創傷，他寫信來抱怨道：“如果我偷走了五分錢的商品，我就是個賊，要受到懲罰；但是如果我偷走了他人妻子的愛情，我沒事兒。”

　　這是許多人心目中普遍存在的一種錯覺——愛情，像商品一樣，可以“偷走”。實際上，許多州都頒布法令，允許索取“情感轉讓”賠償金。

　　但是愛情并不是商品；真情實意不可能買到、賣掉、交換，或者偷走。愛情是一種意愿的行為，是感情的`轉向，是個性上的變化。

　　當丈夫或妻子被另一個人“偷走”時，那個丈夫或妻子就已經具備了被偷走的條件，事先已經準備接受新的伴侶了。這位“愛匪”不過是取走等人取走、盼人取走的東西。

　　我們往往待人如物。我們甚至說孩子“屬于”父母。但是誰也不“屬于”誰。人都屬于自己。孩子是托付給父母的，如果父母不善待他們，政府有權取消父母對他們的托管身份。

　　我們多數人年輕時都有過戀人被某個更有魅力、更迷人的人奪去的經歷。在當時，我們興許怨恨這位不速之客——但是后來長大了，也就認識到了心上人本來就不屬于我們。并不是不速之客 “導致了”決裂，而是缺乏真正的感情。

　　從表面上看，許多婚姻似乎是因為有了 “第三者”才破裂的。然而這是一種心理上的錯覺。另外那個女人，或者另外那個男人，無非是作為借口，用來解除早就不是完好無損的婚姻罷了。

英語美文 On Motes and Beams

　　It is curious that our own offenses should seem so much less heinous than the offenses of others. I suppose the reason is that we know all the circumstances that have occasioned them and so manage to excuse in ourselves what we cannot excuse in others. We turn our attention away from our own defects, and when we are forced by untoward events to consider them, find it easy to condone them. For all I know we are right to do this; they are part of us and we must accept the good and bad in ourselves together.

　　But when we come to judge others, it is not by ourselves as we really are that we judge them, but by an image that we have formed of ourselves from which we have left our everything that offends our vanity or would discredit us in the eyes of the world. To take a trivial instance: how scornful we are when we catch someone out telling a lie; but who can say that he has never told not one, but a hundred?

　　There is not much to choose between men. They are all a hotchpotch of greatness and littleness, of virtue and vice, of nobility and baseness. Some have more strength of character, or more opportunity, and so in one direction or another give their instincts freer play, but potentially they are the same. For my part, I do not think I am any better or any worse than most people, but I know that if I set down every action in my life and every thought that has crossed my mind, the world would consider me a monster of depravity. The knowledge that these reveries are common to all men should inspire one with tolerance to oneself as well as to others. It is well also if they enable us to look upon our felllows, even the most eminent and respectable, with humor, and if they lead us to take ourselves not too seriously.

英語美文 Competition

　　It is a plain fact that we are in a world where competition is going on in all areas and at all levels.This is exciting.Yet, on the other hand, competition breeze a pragmatic attitude.People choose to learn things that are useful,and do things that are profitable.Todays' college education is also affected by this general sense of utilitarianism. Many college students choose business nor computing programming as their majors convinced that this professions are where the big money is. It is not unusual to see the college students taking a part time jobs as a warming up for the real battle.I often see my friends taking GRE tests, working on English or computer certificates and taking the driving licence to get a licence. Well, I have nothing against being practical. As the competition in the job market gets more and more intense, students do have reasons to be practical. However, we should never forget that college education is much more than skill training. Just imagine, if your utilitarianism is prevails on campus, living no space for the cultivation of students' minds,or nurturing of their soul. We will see university is training out well trained spiritless working machines.If utilitarianism prevails society, we will see people bond by mind-forged medicals lost in the money-making ventures;we will see humality lossing their grace and dignity, and that would be disastrous.I'd like to think society as a courage and people persumed for profit or fame as a horese that pulls the courage.Yet without the driver picking direction the courage would go straight and may even end out in a precarious situation .A certificate may give you some advantage, but broad horizons, positive attitudes and personal integrities ,these are assets you cannot acquire through any quick fixed way.In today's world, whether highest level of competition is not of skills or expertise , but vision and strategy. Your intellectual quality largely determinds how far you can go in your career.