對你的愛人,不要說可能會傷害你們感情的話。這點的重要性絲毫不亞于對TA的甜言蜜語。只要一句說錯的話,就可以使一天表現良好的言行付之東流。那些消極而傷人的話會重創你們的感情。
Here are those five things you should NEVER say to your spouse:
以下是對你的愛人堅決不能說的五句話:
1. It's your fault! Sometimes, a financial decision goes bad, one of your children gets in trouble at school, or some household calamity occurs. And know this - things do go bad from time to time in any relationship. Decisions turn out wrong. Stuff happens! But the blame game never works! It alienates. It divides. It most certainly undermines trust and opennein your relationship.
1.那是你的錯!有時,會做出錯誤的經濟開支決定,你的哪個孩子在學校闖禍了,或者出了一些家庭災難。你需要知道,這些事情在任何家庭中都屢次發生。做出錯誤的決定,自然就發生了這樣的事。但是,“責備”絲毫不會奏效。它只會疏遠和離間你們,而且毫無疑問地會傷害到你們之間的信任和坦誠。
2. I told you so! Trust us on this - these four words are rarely ever used in successful marriages. This kind of "comeuppance" has no place in a loving relationship. There is no need to remind your spouse that you were right about something and they were wrong. Talk about wasted criticism!
2.我早告訴過你!相信我,在成功的婚姻里幾乎不會出現這幾個字。在愛情中不應有這種類似于“幸災樂禍”的責難。你完全沒有必要去提醒你的愛人,關于一些事你是對的而TA是錯的。那些批評沒有任何意義。
3. Saying "I am upset with you about this or that . . . ." in a public setting. Telling private secrets or criticizing your spouse in public or to someone else can do permanent damage to the trust in your relationship. True or not - it doesn't matter. Keep private things private.
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